Pity Party

For the past couple days, I've been feeling pretty crappy. It started Sunday, and even though it was a beautiful warm sunshiney day, I was right on the edge of  'blah'. Fortunately my hubby got me out of the house and out into the warm spring air, and I was ok most of the day.

Sunday night and Monday, I moved fully into blah-dom. No energy, no interest, no nothing. Then Monday afternoon I find out that I have been mysteriously cut from this Six Sigma greenbelt class I was supposed to start. As in, it started yesterday - and no one could be bothered to tell me I would not be participating. I had no idea it was even going on until someone mentioned someone else was in the class. As of a month ago, my name was on the list.

What gives???  This was going to add some serious brownie points to my resume!

So I sent my boss an email asking what happened, and I got completely ignored.

Freaking lovely. If for some reason I couldn't do my project this go 'round, could you not have the decency to tell me?! And when I find out, can you not have the balls to explain WTF happened???

I've been with this company for 10 yrs. I've been in this department for 5. Every review, I get told I am the backbone of the team, a major asset to the company, blah blah blah. But this is what I get? I handle projects far above my pay scale, I deal with issues that should be handled by senior staff..... but I am always passed by and over looked when the kudos and the job offers come around.

I am so sick of this. I've got to find something else.


....whew. That was much more of a rant than I was planning.

So back to the point, I've moved from merely 'blah' to full on depressed. I just want to hide under the covers with my cats and not face the outside world.

I took the day off today, because I really didn't know if I could go in and not tell someone where to stick it.

So I've moped around in my pj's for the entire day. I was calling it a "mental health day", but its really a good old fashioned Pity Party.

On a slightly more positive (and diet related) note, at least I am not feeding my face, as I would typically do during a pity party.

Last night as I was peeling out of work, my first thought was "I want ice cream". Followed quickly by "I could stop by Sonic, get some ice cream and some corn dogs"

Not too long ago, I probably would've done it.

But I stopped myself. I came home, and whether it was real hunger or emotional hunger - I wanted food. So I had a toasted sandwich thin with cucumbers, tomatoes, and hummus. An hour or so later, I was still wanting more, so I ate another of those hummus sandwiches.

My husband stopped by Wendy's on the way home, and I had a Single, no cheese and no mayo. Not the best thing for me, for sure.... but I stayed within my daily points range,

I feel like my weight may be up or about the same this week. While that sucks, I think it's because Shark Week is in full effect (which is also the likely cause for my mental status) and I've also had more sodium from processed foods than normal.

I think next week will be better.

Thanks for listening to my rant. Can I have some cheese with my whine?

Feel like I did pretty well on eating yesterday...

did I mention these sweet potatoes were really good?

portioned out my 14 baked tortilla chips, was wanting more, so ate some celery w/ the hummus

roasted chicken (from the grocery store. I just had the breast and took the skin off. The potatoes are called "Crash" potatoes - basically you boil a potato till you can stick a fork in it. Then you spray a cooking sheet w/ Pam, put the potato on the sheet and use the bottom of a glass to crush it. Then you drizzle a little olive oil on it, spring S+P, and bake it at 450 for like 20 min. It was ok - I used red potatoes, and the skin was nice and crispy, but overall it was kind of bland.

the broccoli is just regular Steamfresh Broccoli w/ lowfat cheese sauce from the freezer section. It was a quick easy meal - but just ok.

After dinner I was craving something sweet, so I had a handful of marshmellows. 

Cosmic Humor

As is usually the case, I was running late this morning. I didn't have anything quick to grab for breakfast. No fruit, no yogurt... nothing. (I did manage to grab a Lean Cuisine pizza and a pudding cup for lunch, thank goodness)

Of course, I get to work and I'm starving.

So I scrounge around in my desk drawer and find some blah oatmeal. At least it's warm, right? No taste at all is better than a bad taste, right?

Then, inspiration hits. I have a little bag of mulling spice that I brought to put in tea. It's got all kinds of flavors like cinnamon, cloves, cardamom, and orange. It does have some sugar in it, but I won't use much.... Perfect! I'm actually pretty stoked about my "mulled" oatmeal!

So I've got it in the microwave, and it's smelling all yummy, and my tummy is rumbly.... and someone comes into the breakroom, and I have a brief conversation..... and as I turn to check my oatmeal, I find it has erupted in a hot beige magma-like flow all over the freakin' microwave.

Fab - u - lous.

So I cleaned out the microwave in front of many an amused co-worker, and as I had no oatmeal left, I have made do w/ crap coffee for breakfast.

But the oatmeal I secretly licked off my finger tasted pretty good..... *sigh*

Speaking of beige foods, a co-worker brought in some home made hummus yesterday.... it was really good, and my love of hummus is great -so I thought it would be cool to make my own. I'd love to put some extra Kalmata Olives in, and play w/ different spices and such. The ingredient list is really simple: canned chickpeas, garlic, olive oil, tahini paste. After I finally found the tahini paste (by the peanut butter. I figured it would be with the international foods. Silly me.) It was $10 for a smallish jar! So now I'm trying to use my meager math skills to figure out if I'm actually saving anything. (Do you smell smoke?)

So, more to come on that later.

(Random aside: Dear co-worker with the 25lb bag of peanut M&M's. If I have to hear that bag rattle one more time, knowing the cruchy-chocolatey goodness it contains, I will be forced to snatch the bag from your hand and beat you mercilessly with it. XOXO)

Dinner tonight, spaghetti. Whole wheat pasta, veggies, and some lean ground beef. Nothing exciting, but cheap. Yaaaay Cheap!

However, I have found a recipe for Tortellini Soup that looks pretty yummy... and while Tortellini aren't so good for you, I think the amount of actual 'llini's you'd be getting is far less than if you had it as a part of a main dish. The ingredients are pretty simple: olive oil, garlic, onion, oregano, chicken or vegetable broth, canned whole tomatoes, salt and pepper, cheese tortellini, fresh spinach, and Parmesan cheese.



(photo courtesy of http://thepioneerwoman.com/tasty-kitchen/)

Looks really yummy, right? (minus the hunk of bread and slab of cheese, of course)

In other news, back to Intermezzo this weekend. Intermezzo of the evil pizzas and 1/2 price therefore equally evil martinis. 

*whimper*